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New years resolutions are always a toughie for me because if I make too many it overwhelms me and I tend to just kinda forget about them all. Kind of like when you are SO overwhelmed by the 1 million things on your to do list all in one day so you decide to just forget it all and take a nap. Or maybe thats just me. So this year I decided to really think about what I wanted my goal this year to be… and I have two of them.
One of them came the other night when I was telling David (my husband) this story about when I was in Fiji.. it was late at night and me and three friends were staying at this awesome resort called Mango Bay.. it was our second to last weekend so we decided to try and fit as much as we could into our time at that resort so we go out onto the beach and ‘borrow’ these kayaks that were there. My friend and I took one and the other two took the other and we rowed suuuper far out. Well, it seemed REALLY far.. who knows if it really was, all I know is I could hardly see the shore. It was the most gorgeous night ever, the stars were so bright and it was so dark so you could see every single one it seemed like and the moon was full and gorgeous and there we were sitting in a kayak in Fiji looking up at the most beautiful sky.
I have this super big fear of sharks… and the ocean at night.. actually just the ocean in general (once I get past where I can no longer stand) is so scary to me. I started to freak out as we got further and further out and as soon as we stopped I was starting to really give myself anxiety.. I kept thinking, “what if a shark sees our kayak, hits it with his nose, knocks us over, and we are toast..” and a million other stupid, stupid hypothetical situations that now seem even more silly. Eventually after being out for like 15 minutes we rowed back in because I was being such a baby.
Anyways, I was telling David how I wish I could go back to that moment and just not worry about what ‘could’ happen and just enjoy that moment and soak it all up.
I do that a lot.. I over analyze and I think of the worst case scenario or I worry too much about going to the next place and getting the next thing done or worrying that so and so doesn’t like me so I make myself feel uncomfortable in a social setting or whatever that I kind of miss out on what could be amazing moments.
So that is one of my new years resolutions I guess… if any of that made any sense (maybe someone can relate?). To just enjoy moments and people and let go of some of my worries and reservations (I am extremely shy/reserved around people at first in case you didn’t know). And my other resolution I will keep to myself 🙂
Here is a little shoot I did with a friend of mine, Jenna Bechtholt.. you can visit her photography website: here
Yes I know I am all Windsor’ed out in this post.. honestly, they have the best hidden gems.. those leather leggings I got for $16 (they are now $19.90) and I wear them at least 3 times a week. Love it.